Did I Fool You?

I have a really weird obsession with Bobby Flay. I say weird because I don’t think he’s attractive but for some reason I’m extremely sexually attracted to him. I don’t know if it’s his hint of an accent or pale skin, which I usually don’t dig. I sexually harass him while he’s cooking. I can’t even concentrate on the fucking food.

I hate boobs. They’re great and all, but one word ladies: uniboob. Sports bras are so much easier to wear, but if you’re larger than a c cup they’re impossible to find. Unless you don’t care about uniboob. I tried on several yesterday and they all left me with one arm and one boob stuck. Thank you Champion for making really cute sports bras for girls with small boobs. Bitches. I really want one from Title 9 but I’m not paying $40+.

I hate “articles” like this. I already know too many girls who panic over every move their SO makes. Do we really need articles warning us that a haircut may mean he’s banging someone else? (Apparently if he tries something new, you’ve already lost him!) And especially with a title like “Everyone Cheats.” I once cheated on a math exam, but I have never cheated on a parter thank you. AOL, you blow.